Sunday, June 20, 2010

Grandpa's, Dad's, Father's & Daddies!!!

Happy Father's Day! Jeff and I often joke about the reason people get married. Jeff would tell me that...of course...people get married to have kids but he would then clarify that he married for love. Good save! I would agree to a combination of both.

I will never forget the day I told Jeff he was going to be a father. He wasn't just happy, he was ecstatic. Every week we would read about the stages of my pregnancy and he was fascinated to hear what our baby had developed that week. I should have known when Ben kicked the remote control off my stomach while I was pregnant with him that he was going to be a challenge but Jeff and I just thought it was fun to watch. When Jeff found out that his first son was a boy, he jumped high enough to touch the ceiling. Jeff has 3 sisters so he kinda thought his chance for a boy might be slim. He immediately began calling everyone he knew to let them know that he had a son.

Jeff carried Ben around showing him his house, he took him to the shop and he just walked into fatherhood with confidence. His face always lit up when he saw Ben.

When our second child was born, Jeff was thrilled to have a little girl. He called her "Babers" and as she got older she became his "Muttsy". It didn't take long for her to wrap her Daddy around her little finger. She was "his little princess" and he was her knight in shining armor.

When Ben was 5 we began to realize he might have some learning difficulties. Jeff, listened to me read about Dyslexia and he slowly came to the realization that he himself was also Dyslexic. It was so hard for Jeff to see Ben struggle in school. He understood the challenges that Ben was experiencing and wanted more than anything to make them go away.

So Jeff introduced Ben to tools, the shop and helped him define his interests. Although they are "two peas in a pod" and as we often joke "the apple didn't fall far from the tree", they work, argue, laugh and yell together.

At about the same time, we had our third child, Sam. As our pediatrician walked in and closed the door, Jeff sat next to me and together we found out that Sam had Down syndrome and other health issues. I turned to look at Jeff and I saw the fear and worry that I was experiencing but I also saw a reasurrance that we were going to be alright, that he loved me and...we could do this. We cried, we hugged, we cried, we grieved, we talked and talked. We talked about everything we were thinking, the negative, the positive...and then we chose to accept and move forward together. We knew the journey we were on was going to change our lives...little did we know just how much this little boy would affect us.

Jeff simply loves Sam for being Sam. He chose to focus on Sam, his son and not worry about the label he was given. I think like me, Jeff hated the fact that Sam had health issues but we quickly learned that just like Ben...Sam's challenges came with blessings and we focused on those blessings. To see Jeff with his children is to see him at his best. Even when Ben and Jeff fight there is still a gleam in Jeff's eye that says "Yep, he's just like me". Danielle and Jeff listen to John Tesch together and she will forever be his "Babers" & "Muttsy". And Sam and Jeff...I don't think I can find words to describe the relationship that defines them. I'm not sure who is happier to see the other, Jeff or Sam. Every day, Sam says "Daddy, go work". I reassure him that Daddy will be home after work, he smiles and says "Daddy come home". The sheer joy of that statement for Sam is beyond comprehension.

I love to watch Jeff watch Sam. He never looks at him with anything but love. His smile is wider than normal, his eyes just light up and he looks like he could hug him to pieces. Jeff celebrates Sam's accomplishments no matter how small, over the years he worries less and appreciates more.

Jeff, thank you for being the father you have chosen to be. I love you and your children are so lucky to have you for their Dad!! Happy Fathers Day!!!

I can't forget about my own Dad. This year my Dad faced some health issues that had us worried but in true Dad fashion he came through with flying colors. My Dad is my rock, he is my voice of reason when I am doubting myself. It has been fun to watch my Dad with his grandchildren. Ben challenges his patience but continues to make him laugh. Danielle is a mini me and allows my Dad to relive my childhood memories and Sam is the "apple of his eye". Like Jeff my Dad loves Sam for being Sam. He loves his extra hugs, his smile and his laughter. My Dad always helps me to remember how far Sam has come when I'm feeling down. I love you Dad and I love how you love my children.

I also can't forget my heavenly Father. I put my faith, trust and life in your hands each and every day and you have never let me down. I may not always understand your plans for me but I am thankful for the blessings given.

I pray for all the Dads, Fathers, Grandfathers, Daddies and Dad's to be. You are so very important in the life of a child and I will leave you with this thought:

One night a father overheard his son pray: Dear God, Make me the kind of man my Daddy is. Later that night, the Father prayed, Dear God, Make me the kind of man my son wants me to be.


  1. i love it mom and i love you dad!!!!!!!!