Waiting For Superman...My View!!

I was recently given the opportunity by K12* to attend the movie "Waiting For Superman". This movie has spurred a public uproar regarding the state of our public schools.

"Waiting for "Superman" is a powerful and courageous film. It shows that great schools come from great teachers. And it exposes the forces that deny children more of both.
Many problems plague our public education system and there is no single solution. But this much is clear: It's not the kids. It's not their parents. It's not their neighborhoods. It's an outdated bureaucratic system, the special interests that benefit from it, and the politicians who protect it. Children’s futures must not depend on the zip code where they live or whether they win the educational lottery." http://www.donewaiting.org/

Having attended public schools in Wisconsin and graduating from high school and college with honors my perception of school was always positive and I felt that I had received a solid and good education. I was surprised to learn:

"Despite spending more than $9 billion on public education every year, less than 40% of Wisconsin students are proficient in core subjects such as reading and math while nearly 20% of students end up dropping out." http://www.donewaiting.org/

I had good teachers, bad teachers and exceptional teachers. I never really thought that much about the curriculum or the administration, or the teacher's union because school was easy for me.

And then...

I was blessed with 3 children, 2 with learning differences. I prefer differences over disabilities because after having worked with my children for many years they have taught me that just because they learn differently it doesn't mean the way they learn is wrong or less, it's just simply different. But by working with my children, working with our school system and working with NACD families throughout our state, my perceptions of school/education have changed. I have the unique experience of having a child very similar to me that just flies through school, no worries, very few issues. I have a child that struggles with reading, writing and spelling and hates school but has gifts/strengths that continue to amaze me. I have a child that challenges me every step of the way to figure him out, work with him and generate that spark or interest that will encourage him to engage and learn.

The job of a teacher...a really great, exceptional teacher...is one of the hardest jobs in the world. They are to be commended for their devotion to children. Due to Sam's health/medical issues I have had to homeschool him for many years. Sam has taught me alot over these years and I wish I could say it was all positive. He has shown me my weaknesses, my issues and has challenged me each and every day to become better, to listen to him more, to get into his world and try to understand what matters to him, how he learns, what works, what doesn't and to never, ever give up. Having had that experience my perception of teachers has changed. I do what I do because Sam is my child, given to me by God and I love him to the depths of my soul. He is my passion and I will work with him, enjoy him and love and teach him because I believe in him and his potential.

Now how do I expect another individual, a teacher, a stranger to understand what it takes to help Sam learn??? They have 20 other kids in their class and they simply don't have the time it takes to figure Sam out. But, if I stand behind that line of thinking...then I have already given up on our schools and our teachers. If I look at a broader view and not my own little world, most families can't do what I do with Sam. Both parents need to work or they are a single mom/dad, individualized teaching programs cost money and the time commitment to teach a child like Sam is huge.

In the movie "Waiting For Superman" the five children followed were fairly typical and they were fighting for a good education, a chance to succeed...so can you see my dilemma? What if these children had learning issues or were in need of special education, those parts of our public school system were not discussed. One of the children followed was attending a private school and that is the route we chose to start Ben's education. Smaller classes, more individualized attention, more attention spent on strengths...life was good but not without it's problems. But then that school closed and Ben joined the ranks of the public school, the only other school in our area that would accept an ADHD, Dyslexic learner. I became the parent liaison for special needs families because I love helping other families but I also needed to enter the system, understand the system and make it work for Ben. Ben is in the regular curriculum with a 504 plan. Each year I send out an introduction of Ben to his new teachers and each year I wonder if this will be a good or bad year. Ben's success depends on many factors, if the 504 plan is followed, if the teacher uses both visual/auditory teaching methods, if the information is presented in a manner that engages Ben's mode of learning, if the teacher's presentation method holds enough intensity to spark Ben's interest, if the teacher can see past Ben's weaknesses and focus on his strengths, if the teacher is open to using different teaching methods. I know that's a lot of "if's" and that's just the start. Learning is a two way street. Ben's success also depends on Ben, if he gets enough sleep, if he decides to reign in his focus/attention issues, if he advocates for himself, if he works with a teacher that is trying to work with him, if he chooses to use his adaptive technology or guided study hall regularly, if he puts stronger interests aside and chooses to focus on his education, if he keeps his behavior in check and if he doesn't get too frustrated and chooses to give up.

If, if, if....and any one of those "if's" getting out of whack can mean a really long year of school. But the Ben's in our schools are the "think out of the box" kids, they are problem solvers, they learn to compensate better than other children, they are inventive and when their intrigue is sparked the sky is the limit. I believe these kids, the ones we say are Learning Disabled are probably the ones if worked with and given the chance to pursue their interests could change this world. Our schools spend a lot of time/effort on the honors, high honors kids and yet these are the kids like me that really didn't need all the help...school was easy. We liked school, we liked getting good grades and many of us have gone on to do great things.

But what about the other kids? The ones that struggle. In the movie they showed the time frame of President Bush signing the "No Child Left Behind" act. One of the scenes that struck me was when he said "You don't like testing, too bad, we have to test". Argh!!! Testing...I understand it's purpose but I often wonder how many kids are held back, challenged less, given up on because of testing. I have 2 children that test terribly. If I based my teaching/work with my children on their test scores they would never be doing the work they are now proficient in. I believe that observing a child is so much more powerful than a standardized test, but again that requires time and individual attention.

Another area that peaked my interest and always has is state spending per pupil for education. According to the donewaiting.org site the average spent per pupil in Wisconsin is $12,235. We have had both Ben and Sam on a home program through NACD (http://www.nacd.org/). Ben for a few years, Sam since he was 18 months old. This program has been the answer to our prayers. They look at Ben/Sam from head to toe and create a truly individualized complete program for them. Our program for Sam includes academics, physical therapy, occupational therapy, behavior, vision therapy, speech therapy, sound therapy, focus/attention therapy, auditory processing, daily life skills and any needed intervention that will help Sam continue to grow/learn and reach his full potential. I would not have made the gains with my boys without the help and support of NACD.

We were originally told by well meaning medical professionals that with Sam's multiple issues he would have difficulty walking, he would have difficulty being potty trained, eating & swallowing, and the most devastating he would probably have the cognitive ability of a 2-3 year old child. I got angry, I wanted to know where they got their crystal ball. How can you look at a child that has never been worked with, a child that has never been given a chance to show their strengths or abilities and determine what they will be like as an adult? What if that happened to all of us? What if when you were born your parents were told everything you wouldn't be able to do? Would they have given you the same opportunities or experiences you have had in your life or would it have changed the way they treated you? It was through faith, stubbornness and NACD that Sam surpassed his medical expectations. By the age of 3 Sam was fully potty trained, walking, reading and beginning to enjoy the process of learning. This program is working for Sam, we are getting through and Sam is enjoying learning.

And yet...

Our NACD program costs us $210.00 per month, just $2,520 per year in comparison to the school's $12,235. A program individualized to our child that supports and empowers us as parents to work with our children. Our family was fortunate enough to get Family Support and the State Waiver for Sam this year and for a short time they agreed to pick up the cost for Sam's NACD program. Other parents from our state began to pursue the same for their children but were turned down. I could have kept my mouth shut and thought of only my child but that's not right, that's not fair so I decided to rock the boat knowing that Sam's coverage would be jeopardized. I again placed faith and hope that our bureaucracy would choose to do what works, would listen to parents who believe in the program and can demonstrate through their children the success they have seen...I again placed hope that they would think about the child. But...unfortunately they let me down again, they pulled Sam's funding saying that unless NACD can provide peer reviewed research showing the benefit of their programs they could not fund it. How is NACD supposed to fund peer reviewed research on every type of diagnosis their program works with considering each of their programs are truly individualized to the child and get it published in reputable scientific journals?? NACD is spending their time working with kids and teaching parents how to work with their kids not spending that same precious time documenting and pushing paper work. Our government and our state seem to place a higher importance on paper work than working with our children. A well done IEP, Katie Beckett form, Family Support Application is what they seem to want, it’s all about the documentation and we have forgotten about the child. That well written piece of paper is not going to teach Sam or any child to read/write or learn. It is the people that work with them, their parents, their school, their therapists and it is providing those people with the needed support that is going to truly make a difference in Sam and other children's lives.

I do not know how to fix our schools? I have been concentrating on figuring out what will work with my children and sharing that information in the hope that it will benefit another child.

Hmmm...maybe Sam's challenge is his answer to the problem?? What if our politicians and school administration were challenged to do the same thing Sam requires of me...what if they acknowledged their weaknesses, issues and challenged themselves to become better, to listen more, to get into the child's world and try to understand what matters to them, how they learn, what works, what doesn't and to never, ever give up. Sam's answer is better than anything I could come up with. Thanks Sam!!

I do think the suggestions documented at http://www.donewaiting.org/ of:

1. Create more high quality schools. Because every kid in every neighborhood deserves access to a high quality school we must expand proven school models, such as high performing charter schools, and failing schools should be reformed or closed. Insist lawmakers back policies that allow for equal treatment of all schools, in terms of facilities and operating funding.
2. Demand an effective teacher in every classroom. Support polices aimed at recruiting, promoting, and retaining the best, most effective teachers based upon student results and treat them like a valued professionals, not widgets.
3. Support the Milwaukee Parental Choice program so that qualifying low-income students can attend any school of their choice as long as the accepting schools agree to accountability for public dollars with the same tests as public schools.
4. Put the needs of kids before the politics of special interests. http://www.donewaiting.org/

These are all a good start and would benefit every child. If we don't figure this out we are only hurting ourselves. We have all heard the phrase, "our children are our future". When will that become more than just a phrase?




*Like the parents in the film, Waiting for Superman, K12 believes that access to a quality education is one of the most important things we can give our children. K12 is the leader in online education for grades K – 12, with tuition-free, public school programs in more than half the States and D.C., as well as a private online school – the K12 International Academy – serving students across America and in more than 40 countries. Students in K12 schools get the best of both worlds: engaging, online curriculum along with award-winning books and hands-on materials, plus one-to-one attention from highly qualified teachers. All students receive an individualized learning plan, creating an educational program that is tailored to their learning style, pace, and needs.

Learn more by visiting K12.com or connecting with our community of parents and teacher on K12’s Facebook, Twitter, and Blog. Discover more about K12’s Wisconsin’s online public school option at WIVA.

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A Day in the Life...

I have spent a huge amount of time this last week preparing Ben for finals. Yesterday, he and I buckled down to complete 10 chapters of questions for Biology that he did on Dragon Naturally Speaking, locating and organizing flashcards from two classes and writing out in as small of text as possible...while still remaining readable...a half page note card for his World Studies final.

In an effort to break away and relieve a little stress my husband and I had a date night on Saturday which included dinner, the Snowrunner's Dance and not getting home, unbelievably, until 2:30 a.m. I needed that...thank you, Jeff!!!

After going to church and taking Sam to Sunday school I also had to get his new NACD program ready for a fresh start on Monday morning. This included arranging the 53 small post it notes that contain each element of his program, finding and organizing and sometimes creating the flashcards, mirror, computer books, CD's, DVD's and PowerPoint presentations that help to make that process go smoothly. If that is possible????

Soooo, last night as I finished helping Ben study for his World Studies exam I finally crawled into bed at 10:45 p.m. I was so tired, I was sure I couldn't do another thing. But I was wrong. Instead of blissfully falling off to sleep to dream about less stressful times in warmer climates with fewer responsibilities...I instead couldn't turn my brain off. I was reviewing Sam's program, organizing Ben's final exam study schedule, figuring out when I would go into work this week, trying to remember where I put Sam's Arthur Math computer game, worrying about how Ben was handling the stress and how close he was to shutting down, figuring out how I would get Sam to do some of his oral motor activities (not exactly the favorite part of program), wondering what dinners I could throw together quickly this week, worrying about my Dad's health and other friends who are dealing with health issues, wondering how Sam is going to do this week as he starts some classes in the public school, worrying about what that could mean to his health, thinking about what else needs to be done before we launch the new Possibility Playground website, worrying about how my balance with Danielle is so far off due to the boys and how I will correct that, thinking about the friends and dinners I have put on hold to make this life....this crazy life.....work. And there was more, the thoughts, concerns and commitments just kept spinning in my head never allowing me to stop and fall asleep. At 2:00 in the morning I was hoping they would start to spin so fast I would get dizzy and pass out, at 3:00 I was up checking a possible Sam hiding space for his math program (I found it)...this continued until 4:00 am when I finally fell asleep from pure exhaustion. I remember looking at the clock at 3:45 and telling myself, think of nothing besides your breathing. At one point when I was so close to falling asleep I started thinking again about why I didn't think of this a heck of a lot earlier and had to start all over. Arrrgghhhh!

I power slept until 6:00 am when my husband woke me as he got ready for work. Five minutes later Ben was up asking me to study and I had to get him on the bus at 6:45. While I was studying with Ben, Sam woke up and began making noise in his bedroom. I knew a new day had begun even though I felt like the last one had never ended. It's funny how things come to you, how suddenly you see a situation in a new light with new meaning. I always say it's God's way of sending me little messages. As I was listening to Ben jump from story to story in order to tell me everything he was thinking of at that moment and I listened to Sam talking about what he was going to do and what he was thinking about, "Sam, get up, go downstairs, see Mommy, Daddy go to work in truck" I realized that my evening...my very difficult evening must be very much like Ben and Sam's everyday. I have always said that Ben and Sam remind me of a very busy train station or an air traffic control station in the busiest airport on earth and they are the only one's there running everything. These two boys have so many thoughts, ideas and just stuff running through their heads every moment of every day. My one night is nothing compared to their every day. I think God wanted me to appreciate the difference, understand the challenge and respect the tenacity it takes for them to focus and learn.

It had to be God because he also gave me the strength to have a wonderful first day working with Sam and to have just enough strength, patience and perseverance to make it through this day. I am not stressing, I am not feeling sorry for myself...I am counting my blessings, I am thanking God for lessons learned, experiences shared and for giving me the privilege of learning from two of the best teachers in the world. You see both of them learn best when they experience and do it themselves...this is just another day and another valuable lesson learned.

I Dream of High School Graduation!

Okay, maybe I should clarify...I've already made it through high school and even college but the graduation I am referring to is my oldest son's high school graduation.

I think I under estimated Ben's insightfulness when he was younger. Starting at the age of 5, Ben would end each school year, thanking his teachers and telling them he appreciated what they had taught him but he would not be coming back because he was going to start working. It's funny now that he is in high school, I am the one that would like to be making that same statement...thanking his teachers but letting them know that we're feeling done with school and Ben is just going to go to work. For me, getting Ben through school is work and here's why...

A. He would rather be working earning money than going to school.
B. The new school year means it is time to update Ben's letter of introduction to his new teachers and advise them of his 504 plan and what it means to be Dyslexic, ADHD and LD.
C. A new year means new teachers, new teaching styles, different methods of testing...trying to make it all work for Ben.
D. Each year I begin to monitor Ben's grades to see if he is staying engaged, working hard or requiring some motivation or incentive and then putting that plan into place.
E. Each year I try to keep the line of communication open between Ben and I so we can work together to figure out where the challenges are and how he needs to adjust and compensate.

Our school district and most of Ben's teachers have been wonderful to work with...but it is work. I have over the years figured out some things that really work well for Ben's situation. In the next few posts, I will describe those in detail.

The first one is taking the time to write a letter of introduction to Ben's teachers. Helping them to understand how Dyslexia affects Ben along with opening a line of communication has been crucial. A mistake a lot of parents make is assuming their teacher has been trained to work with their child's disability. Each of our children is different and a label doesn't tell a teacher what Ben's particular issues are. Here is Ben's intro. letter:

Subject: (Child's Full Name)

Dear Staff,

I wanted to take a moment to introduce Ben and our family. Ben will be a freshman this year. Ben attended St. John’s Lutheran Academy from 3 year preschool-6th grade. He was homeschooled most of his 4th grade year through a program from NACD (http://www.nacd.org/). He attended (Child's school) Middle School for the last two years.

A little history about Ben. Ben was born on (birthdate). Ben began speaking at a very early age and was talking about articulated dump trucks by the age of 2. He was extremely industrious, thoroughly enjoyed puzzles, legos and anything to do with construction equipment. Ben often built lego creations just by looking at the picture and could build them in 3 dimensions perfectly although he only saw a one dimensional picture. When I asked Ben how he was able to do that, he would look at me and say, “Don’t you see it, the back and the sides?”

Ben was fascinated by tools and began using power tools at the age of 3. By 5 he was driving a riding lawn mower, at age 7 he learned how to weld, at age 8 he was operating large construction equipment including an overhead crane. Ben began collecting his tools at the age of 4 when he decided he would rather have Home Depot gift cards instead of any toys or gift cards for toys. Ben now has one of the most comprehensive set of tools I have ever seen. Ben has been going to my husband’s shop, since he was 5 years old. He can’t manage to wake up for school but gets up without an alarm clock every Saturday at 5:30 a.m. to eat breakfast with the guys at the truck stop and then to go to work with his Dad. Ben takes apart old heating/air conditioning units and turns in the scrap for money. With this money Ben has been able to purchase his own dirt bike, a brand new Yamaha snowmobile for Christmas and has managed to put a good amount into his college fund. He continually purchases tools and his favorite gift card of choice to date is Snap On. Ben’s favorite Christmas gift was an equipment dolly.

We knew early on Ben was unique. We could walk into a room and when we left the amount of detail he could tell you about was astounding. He would ask his Grandma where things were if he saw something moved or different in her house, it sort of became a game. He could describe people and equipment down to the color of their shoe laces or the color of the paint scrape that was on the tire.

We thought school was going to be a breeze since Ben seemed extremely intelligent and willing to learn. Ben started at St. John’s in 3 year old preschool, he seemed to only observe and rarely participated. In 4 year preschool he began to tell his teacher when she did things differently than the year before and participated more readily but mainly in those areas that interested him. In Kindergarten they began to work with letters and reading, this is where we quickly picked up on a problem. Ben had difficulty blending words, writing anything and would get extremely frustrated when asked to do so. His teacher felt he would grow out of it, I felt differently.

At the age of 7, Ben was tested by a psychologist from Achievement Associates. It was then we learned that Ben was diagnosed Dyslexic, ADHD and Learning Disabled in Reading, Writing and Spelling. We chose to keep Ben in his private school because the school was willing to work with us, we wanted a Christian education for Ben, he would have a great deal of one on one attention due to a very small class size, the curriculum was extremely challenging (Core Knowledge Curriculum, www.coreknowledge.org), and the school would focus on his strengths instead of his weaknesses. I did a lot of research on Dyslexia, Ben had a tutor, and we attended many sessions and workshops on ways to help Ben with his learning issues including a 3D Learner Program in Florida. The first 4 years were very rough, a lot of peaks and valleys and unfortunately in 4th grade Ben’s disabilities overtook his abilities.

I pulled Ben from 4th grade and chose to homeschool him through the National Association of Childhood Development, http://www.nacd.org/. Along with Ben, we have a daughter Danielle who is 12 and our youngest son Sam who is 8 and has Down Syndrome, a brain injury, apraxia, dysphagia and bilateral conductive hearing loss. Sam has been on program with NACD since he was 18 months old. I will not say this was an easy year but it was definitely needed to help Ben. We worked on so many core areas of Ben’s neurodevelopmental profile. Ben’s visual processing was at an 8 to an emerging 9 but his auditory processing was at a 5, which is the equivalent of having a 5 year old in your 4th grade class. His coordination and fine motor skills required a great deal of work. He and I learned how to work together, how it was easier for him to be active while learning, we did spelling while riding bikes, history while digging a hole and bounced a ball while working on processing. We researched people with Dyslexia like Walt Disney and Charles Schwab and learned how despite their learning issues they succeeded in life. To bring up Ben’s reading level we did high intensity reading which for Ben meant we read Bronco Builder magazine, Caterpillar literature, John Deere literature and the history of the Yamaha Corporation. When Ben returned to school in the 4th quarter for testing to see if he could return the following year his teachers were amazed. They were sure we had medicated Ben, but we didn’t, although at times I was tempted. Ben returned to school with an increase of 2 years in his reading ability, his auditory processing at a 7, and his self esteem back in tack. Ben has done well over these last few years. We still have an occasional D or F in the course Ben decides he is not interested in and he still struggles significantly with writing and spelling. This has been an interesting journey for Ben and us as his parents. Ben is a very bright boy, he is going to do well in this world, but he needs help in learning how to work with his disabilities in reading, writing and spelling. He has always chosen to work on his issues with me at home because being in a small school there was no one else there like Ben and he didn’t want to stand out as being different. However, I have learned in working with Ben that he will choose what he wants or doesn’t want to do. We have purchased both Kurzweil and Dragon Naturally Speaking for Ben to use but I know he will have to decide if it is helpful to him or not therefore choosing if he will use it or not. Ben’s 7th grade school year went well but one of his teachers felt he would benefit from the LD program. I disagreed because I think Ben needs more challenge in order to stay focused, if the work is easier he tends to drop both his effort and attitude and his behavior can escalate. He has done well in most of his 8th grade classes with the occasional need to have us help him get refocused and engaged but his teachers have been great in letting me know when he seems to be dropping off.

Ben has taught me a great deal in how to work with him and his little brother. We are both nervous and excited about Ben coming to the High School. His self esteem is good right now and by far that is the hardest area to work on when it gets out of whack. I would ask that his teachers keep me in the loop on how he is doing, what he is excelling at and what he seems to be struggling with. We have also asked (child's counselor) to be Ben’s go to point when he is not understanding, struggling or requiring additional help. We are working on having him advocate for himself. He is a great kid but if he gets bored his behavior can take a turn. Ben will need to sit near the front of the class, not in the front row but limiting the distractions will be helpful. Because I have worked one on one with Ben I am more than happy to share my experiences with his new teachers. Please understand that Ben’s issues do not have to do with intelligence or his ability to understand what you are teaching, but instead deal with his ability to show what he has learned in a written form. I have included further information on Dyslexia to help you understand how it affects Ben.

Thank you for taking time to read this. Thank you for working with us to insure that Ben has a bright future and reaches his full potential. I have expressed many times that raising 3 children, 2 with learning disabilities was not the program I signed up for. But Ben, Danielle and Sam have taught me so much and I am enjoying each of their journeys which as you can imagine are each very different. Have a great school year and please stay in touch!

Sincerely,

Jeff & Sue Mayer